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Song Details
Rank this week: 31 (↑44)
Duration: 8:11 
Release Date: 1983  (karlap) 
Lyrics By: Eddie Murphy (karlap) 
Music By: Eddie Murphy (karlap) 
Produced By:
Released By:
Published By:
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Keywords:
Reviews:
Facts:
  • In 1997, Murphy was stopped by LA Sheriff deputies at 4:45 am in West Hollywood with a transvestite prostitute in his car. (karlap)
  • The correct title is Faggots Revisited/Sexual Prime. (karlap)
  • Song Lyrics:
    **(Audience:)**
    Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie!

    **(Announcer:)**
    Ladies and Gentlemen, Eddie Murphy!

    Thank you. Thank you too much. Too kind, far too kind.
    Before I even get started, before I even get started
    I want to um, say,
    How 'bout a big round of applause for the busboys?

    I get some rules, I got some rules when I throw down,
    when I do my standup I got rules and s**t.
    Straight up, um,
    Old people that get offended easily,
    You all should just get the f**k out now.
    'Cause I do some nasty s**t while I'm up here.

    And if you brought your kids down
    and thought I'd be up here with the Buckwheat wig on,
    you're in this for a motherfuckin' surprise.
    'Cause I don't do none of that Saturday Night Live s**t in concert.
    If you want to see that s**t, watch it at home for free.
    If you paid to see it, you're a stupid m**********r.

    Also, faggots aren't allowed to look at my ass while I'm onstage.
    That's why I keep movin' while I'm up here.
    Now if you don't know where the ****** section is, you gotta keep movin'.
    So if they do see it it's quick, and you switch.
    They don't get no long stare at your s**t
    and start havin' imagination flowin' on my, by my,
    I know when you're lookin' at it too, because my ass gets hot.

    'Cause I'm afraid of gay people. Petrified.
    I have nightmares about gay people.
    I have this nightmare that I go to Hollywood
    and find out that Mr. T is a ******.
    Really, he be walkin' up to people going

    "Hey boy! Hey boy! You look might cute in them jeans.
    Now come on over here, and f**k me up the ass.
    Come on! I'm gonna bend over now.
    Uungh! Aaagh!
    Hey boy, slow down.
    You're going to mess around and come too fast and make me get mad.
    I'll clench up my butt cheeks and rip your dick off."

    You know, you know, you know who would be a funny ******?
    Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton.
    Wouldn't they be funny faggots?
    And Ralph Kramden leanin' out the window there one day sayin'

    "Norton! Norton, pal! Come on down! I want to show you something.
    HEH HEH"

    "Hey Ralphie boy, what do you say there, pal of mine?"

    "You know Norton, I've been watchin' you.
    And I know you've been watchin' me, Norton.
    You're watchin'. I know."

    "So Ralph, what are you gettin' at?"

    "Norton my friend, how would you like to f**k me up the ass?
    I know you want to f**k me, Norton!
    And you know that I know that you know that I know
    that you want to f**k me.
    Now I'm gonna bend over. And when I do, start ******'!
    Here I go!"

    "Whoooooooooah!
    Hummuna-hummunah-hummunah-hummunah-hummunah-hummunah-hu..."

    "Way to go there, Ralphie boy!"

    I kid the homosexuals a lot, cause they're homosexuals.
    I, I f**k with everybody, I don't give a f**k.
    It's like um, I don't mean anything by it.
    You can hang out with a gay person. You can guys
    Don't feel, you know like alienated gay people 'cause they're gay.
    'Cause you can play tennis with a gay person.
    Really, just after the game you say

    "I'm gonna get a beer, what you gonna do?"

    "I think I'll go suck somebody's dick."

    "Well, I'll see you later. Take it easy.
    You go suck that dick. I'm gonna have the beer."

    Ladies are hip to it too. Ladies be hangin' out with gay people.
    Ladies be saying

    "Gay men are the best fiends to have.
    'Cause they don't want anything from you
    and you don't want anything from them
    and he can just hang out and you can be with him
    and it's fun and you can talk to them"

    and all that bullshit and they be hangin' out with them.

    You know what's real scary about that? That new AIDS s**t.
    AIDS is scary 'cause it kills motherfuckers, AIDS.
    That ain't like the good old days when venereal disease was simple.
    In the good old days you'd get gonorrhea and your dick hurt,
    Go get a shot, clear it right up.
    Then they came out with herpes. You keep that s**t forever like luggage.
    Now they got AIDS. That just kills motherfuckers.
    I say what's next? I guess you just put your dick in and it explode.
    **(explosive vocal effect)**
    and the girl will be on the bed and go

    "Maybe I should see a doctor about this."

    Kills people! And I be petrified because girls be hangin' out with them.
    And one night they could be in the club havin' fun with their gay friend
    and give them a little kiss
    **(lip-smacking sound)**
    and go home with their AIDS on their lips.
    Get home with their husband and like five years later it's

    "Mr. Johnson, you have AIDS."

    He goes

    "AIDS? But I'm not a homosexual."

    "Sure, you're not a homosexual."

    All them diseases scare me 'cause I'm like
    these, these the fuckiest for me like,
    I, this, I'm twen-, I'm in my sexual prime.
    This, I, f**k that! All right?
    These are the years to f**k.
    This where you do your best ******', where you just start to learn your body
    and be gettin' all your shoulders in on the f**k, you know.

    Like eighteen year olds, let me hear you all in the audience.

    **(Cheers from audience)**

    So you don't all know how to f**k yet, see? You don't!
    You hit twenty two, you start movin' all this s**t, makin' faces.
    Ever make them f**k faces? You're cool motherfuckers here.
    You don't do that when you're eighteen, there's just one expression
    'cause you be surprised you're ******'.
    Get a little older though.
    Plus you don't have no dick control when you're eighteen.
    Ever been sittin' around when you was young man
    and just sittin' in class and your dick get hard for nothin'?
    You just be sittin' and your dick say

    "Hey what's goin' on in here?"

    And that's when your teacher say

    "Mr. Murphy, want to come work out this problem on the board?"

    "No, that's all right. I'll take the zero."

    Really, no dick control at all.
    It's even hard to find a ***** when you're eighteen.
    Ever had that guys, where you be searchin' for the ***** down there?
    And your dick would be slidin' down and s**t, and the girl be goin'

    "That's not it, baby! ... Is there any problem?"

    "No ain't no problem baby.
    You got a shoehorn or some s**t like that on you?"

    (karlap)
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