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Duration: 2:47 
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Song Lyrics:
Here is a tale of the old, wild west
Our hero wore a shiny star on his vest
He was known to always uphold the law
A real man's man and quick on the draw


Wyatt Earp! That was his name
And this is the story how he won fame:
It started in a lawless town.
There were lots of real bad hombres around.


They laughed at the law; They didn't care.
There were 22 sheriffs buried there.


Thurl: "We need a man to uphold the law;
A real man's man and quick on the draw."


Freddy: "You're right, but don't forget Big Red.
Every sheriff we hire, he fills full of lead."


Thurl: "Well how 'bout hirin' Wyatt Earp?"


Mousie: "Wyatt Earp? He makes me burp"


(Inst: Shave and a haircut - burp burp!)


George: "Well, I seen why. I'm a tellin' no lie.
He faced two hombres with blood in their eye.
They started to draw; They were ready for fightin'
But Wyatt's draw was like greased lightnin'.
In a second those two hombres were dead.
Mighty heavy, too, all full of lead."


Crowd: "Wyatt Earp! That's our man!
Let's get him here as fast as we can!"


Thurl: "Well, one day, a stranger came riding in
With cold blue eyes and a big square chin
Two six-guns strapped on his hips
A dangerous man with tight grim lips.
In less than a minute the news got around
Wyatt Earp had come to town!


At the Silver Dollar, things were goin' full blast
When Wyatt glanced in as he walked past:
He stopped and went inside instead
'Cause standin' at the bar was - Big Red!


(instrumental: villain theme)


Red (George Rock): "I've just robbed the bank"
Thurl" "...he shouted with glee..."
Red: "Everybody step up; The drinks are on me.
Let's drink to that yellow skunk Wyatt Earp"


Mousie: "Wyatt Earp? He makes me burp"
(Inst: Shave and a haircut - burp burp!)


Thurl: "Suddenly it got as quiet is could be.
Big Red just stared, for in the mirror he could see
Wyatt standin' there with a smile on his lips
And those two famous six-shooters hangin' at his hips.


Suddenly, the spell was broke.
It was Wyatt who very softly spoke,
Wyatt: "Howdy, Big Red, I'm Wyatt Earp"


Mousie: "Wyatt Earp? He makes me burp"
(Inst: Shave and a haircut - burp burp!)


SFX: Bang Bang Bang Bang! Whizz - "Ooof!"


Thurl: "Well, the rest is only history.
Wyatt had a draw just like lightning, you see.
Red never should have tangled with Wyatt Earp."


Mousie: "Wyatt Earp? He makes me burp."


Inst: "Shave and a haircut..." (silence)
"Shave and a haircut..." (silence)


Spike: "I guess he ran out of gas."

(courtesy of Ted Hering posted on rec.music.dementia)

(peterpuck9)
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