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Song Details
Duration: 3:24 
Release Date: 1983  (sfjpk30) 
Lyrics By:
Music By:
Produced By: Marvin Dolgay (Edwin1) 
Released By:
Published By:
Song Lyrics:
Leader: Hello, everyone. Welcome to Weight Watchers. Have we all been good this week?
People: Well, you know...
Leader: We have someone graduating tonight, I'm sure he will be an inspiration to us all. Tell us how much you lost, Clint.
Clint: Eighty pounds.
Leader: Eighty pounds, that's wonderful, and you're keeping it off with the diet?
Clint: Well, mainly with the substitutions.
Leader: The substitutions?
Clint: Yeah, you know, one milk portion equals one scotch, one bread portion equals one scotch...
Leader: But Clint, but Clint, what about your balance, your fruits and your vegetables?
Clint: Bloody Mary and a stick of celery.
Leader: Well, the point is you've done it, Clint. Could you tell us your secret?
Clint: My secret? You people here were my secret. Anytime I felt like giving up, I thought of you people here.
Leader: Oh, isn't that wonderful.
Clint: You gave me the impetus, because, quite frankly, you people are fat. You people are disgustingly fat, you roly poly porkers really make me puke.
Leader: Now, Clint, you can't say that.
Clint: Oh yeah, keep on talking so I can see where your mouth is.
Lotta: You used to be fat too.
Clint: Yeah, so I couldn't say anything, but now I'm thin, I can tell you gluttons off. There's so much sweat in this room, I have salt stains on my Hush Puppies!
Leader: We are trying to change, Clint!
Clint: Oh, please, don't say the word "change." The though of you hippos sliding in and out of your polyester tarpaulins is enough to make my oatmeal hit the wall.
Leader: The important thing is that people care enough to come to these meetings...
Clint: The only reason people come to these meetings is, this place has double doors.
Lotta: I don't think that's funny.
Clint: Well, I don't care what you think, Little Lotta. Anyone with no discernible neck is not allowed to have an opinion.
Lotta: You're no better than us!
Clint: No, but I'm thinner. The hairs on your head are an inch apart; to find your knees, you have to check for the indent; and look at your feet--okay, trick question--but take it from me, your ankles are drooping over the sides of your shoes; and you, the Mama Cass impersonator.
"Mama Cass": I'm very proud of the weight I've lost. I'm now down to a size 13.
Clint: A size 13 what, battleship? And stop pointing those bowguns at me.
Leader: That's not much of an attitude, Clint.
Clint: Yeah, but that's how I get it! Anytime I felt like chowing down, I thought of you butterballs, how your backs spill over your chairs. It was inspirational, and I really wanna thank you all.
Leader: Oh, well, you're welcome...
Clint: Don't talk to me, I don't talk to fat people anymore. I mean, my God, some of you have dimples on your noses. All right, I'm through with this, now I'm joining A.A.
Leader: Sounds like you're aiming to be perfect.
Clint: If I ever do become perfect, am I ever gonna tell God what I think of Him.
Current Rating 8.5 (4 votes)
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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