I Don't Give A s**t About Your Website  By: Worm Quartet

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Duration:	5:03
Release Date:	1999  (DJ Particle)
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Licensing:	CC
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I got an email from this guy who claims to know me Claimed he graduated from my high school in the class two years below me And he sat three seats behind me in my composition class And he remembers my old Anthrax shirt that showed off the crack of my ass. "Anyway," he says, "just figured I should drop you a line "To let you know that my home page is finally online "It took me weeks and weeks, but it's finally all done "So surf on over, cyber-buddy, it'll be such fun!" He closed with the ugliest signature I'd seen in a while And a cliched, insincere colon-parenthesis smile, The message then repeated with a lot of brackets in it I stared in utter horror as I sat there for a minute From this onslaught of stupidity my mind was f***ing beat But from deep in my mind a voice screamed "DAMMIT, DELETE!" As my pointer flailed in panic trying to send this thing to hell I accidentally clicked right on his f***ing U-R-L The screen went yellow, but the font was yellow, too So I couldn't see a thing and there was nothing I could do My P-120 churned and growled like the hard-drive was exploding Thirty minutes went by and the first banner was still loading I clicked "Stop" and I clicked "Exit" but my browser just ignored me And three dozen Geocities ads were popping up before me Every ad in its own window, every window spawned another And the windows spawned more windows till the screen was f***ing smothered I went for a walk just so some time could be spent I came back and it was still sitting at two per cent So I made myself some dinner and I played a game of Doom I read a couple novels and I wallpapered my room Three days later it was loaded and my keyboard started to function There was nothing but a ten gig jpeg saying "Under Construction" The only link on the site said "CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL ME!" So I picked a font big enough for astronauts to see and typed... I don't give a s**t about your f***ing website I don't give a s**t about the life you live I wouldn't give a s**t about your f***ing website If I had a hundred spare shits to give! A few days later, another blast from the past I got an email from an ex who had dumped me on my ass She said, "My website's up, it's something you've gotta see!" So I figured I should just make sure there weren't any pictures of me I clicked and suddenly I was bathed in cutesy clip art galore With more flowers, birds and bunnies than a f***ing Hallmark store It said, "This is my page and it's all about me! "Everything you'll ever need to know, updated daily!" There were stories about her sister, and pages about her prom, And pictures of the 'coming out' party for her mom, There were pictures of her friends, and pictures of her hats And a hundred thousand pictures of her scraggly, ugly cats There were links to every f***ing page that she even knew And each one of them was broken, she even misspelled 'Yahoo!' When I finally read through every f***ing poem she'd ever wrote I figured it was time to drop the stupid b***h a note, saying... I don't give a s**t about your f***ing website I don't give a s**t about the life you live I wouldn't give a s**t about your f***ing website If I had a hundred spare shits to give. More synth now! There's so much bulls**t on the web and it fills me with rage Hell, even Bea Arthur has her own f***ing page So don't waste my precious time; each day is only so long I could be using that time to write another stupid song So the moral of this story, I think it's plain to see If your website sucks big walrus c**k, don't send it to me And if you do, don't be surprised if I get really pissed And subscribe you to the "Michael Bolton Fan Club" mailing list! I don't give a s**t about your f***ing website I don't give a s**t about the life you live I wouldn't give a s**t about your f***ing website If I had a hundred spare shits to give.(X2) PRANCE! I don't give a s**t I don't give a s**t About your mo********ing website (repeat and fade) (wannablessedbe)

Available on the following albums:
Forgotten Fishheads: Volume 69	Sumophobia
Contact us if you know of another album that contains this song

Played on 4 shows:
	05-28-12, #MM-261		05-09-06, #WB-02
	05-27-06, #ROTP_092		02-18-06, #ROTP_078
	= Show you can listen to online

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