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Duration: 4:04 
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Licensing: ASCAP  #200067472 
  • Parody of Nutcracker Suite (Dave AuJus)
  • Song Lyrics:
    'Thong March'

    What a delightful gift idea
    Magical shorts that disappear
    Buy your loved one this noel
    The kind of gift you can't resell
    Because it kind of smells
    If someone else has tried it on

    You could be dancing cheek to cheek
    Wiggle the string play hide and seek
    Buy your workmate or your boss
    The proctologic dental floss
    That really works a hair across
    His astronomic bum

    'Dance of the Plumber Fairy'

    See the repair man go
    Tink-a-tink, tink-a-tink, tink-a-tink
    Working on the sink
    Bending way down low
    See the big tool belt go
    Slippy-slip, slippy-slip, slippy-slip
    Sliding down his hip
    Say it isn't so
    See the rear cleavage go
    Peek-a-boo, peek-a-boo, peek-a-boo
    Cheekie sneaking through

    See ya at so 'n so
    See the plumber
    Doesn't even show
    What a bummer
    Get a dial tone
    Called a number
    On the telephone
    Hire someone else

    'Wedgie Dance'

    Spin around and stretch and lunge
    And Leap!
    Do a kick and shake your buns
    And fix those wedgies everyone
    Let's go!

    Double dip and somersault
    Then Split!
    Shuffle back and twist and fall
    And fix those wedgies
    Fix those wedgies
    Let's go people
    Fix those wedgies

    Cracks are flyin' just keep pryin'
    And pull
    Pull hard!
    And pull
    Pull hard!
    And pull
    Pull hard those leotards!

    'Waltz of the Buttcrackers'

    Please just say no to crack
    When you spot butt crack attack
    You can see a trucker change a tire
    Or a cable worker fix a wire
    Let him know his bottom line is looking out
    Somehow you don't admire it

    So everybody please just say no to crack
    Give all those crack backs a sack
    If you see a plumber show a breach
    Or a tubby hubby on a beach
    Sneak right up behind his back and strike a match and drop the burning sulfur right between his cheeks

    Because as sure as pants and men surround us
    Cracks are all around us
    Slacks fall to the ground as
    Miles and miles of spoil going up and down

    Don't be unbound near a crowd get a grip
    Fix your drawers
    Every Fall ride along take 'em back
    To the stores

    Show some class and hide that massive astronomic butt crack

    Get in the truck
    Cover the crack
    Gimme the thong
    Hurry along

    Buttcrackers just aren't...sweet!

    (Dave AuJus)
    Current Rating 0.0 (0 votes)
    Played on 2 shows:
    12-03-14, #MMS-19012-17-13, #BWR-13-12-17
    = Show you can listen to online
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    Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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