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| Song Lyrics: |
EI: Hello, and welcome to Old Compton Street, it's a mild night
here, warm for early April, and a large crowd has gathered
outside to watch this great gala night for the stars.The cars
are arriving quite fast now, here's a beautiful Rolls Royce
Silver Corniche, all white, sliding gracefully up to the doors
of the cinema. Commisioner Alf Venables, ex-father of Terry,
steps forward, opens the door, and out steps a radiant Miss
Taylor herself, looking absolutely stunning and off the ---
organs are in silk dress, and next comes Burt Reynolds in a
huge red Ferrari sports car and... My God! Burt Reynolds has
run into a splendid gesture at... Great heavens! It's Steve
McQueen --- --- somersaulted through the air and --- into the
back bumper of --- And who's this coming through the windscreen of the Mini...yes, it's lovely star Barbara Streisand flying through the air in a beautiful build of creation...and she's landed half on Roger Moore, looking quite well and half on Jack Nicholson, who's not so well, and who's that under the back wheel? It's..yes! It's Faye Dunaway! No, no...it's Victor --- Yes, all the stars are here tonight...that's --- squashed in between the bonnet and Pete Murray and the box office door...and Shirley Temple ahead battered out of all definition...
MP: Ho, yes, a great galaxy of stars there, but now here at the
Classic, the lights are dimming, the film is about to commence,
so, from the gentlemens' rest room, over colleague, Dougie Nero
in the rear stalls.
JC: Welcome to the rear stalls! I'm in Row T, just three seats
along from the legendary seat 12. And now, the titles are
coming to an end, as the film finally get well and truly all
your own. I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that. Anyway, the
film is now underway. [Clopeti] And it's going quite well at
the moment. Ahh...
King Arthur in film: Whoa, there! (Audience starts laughing
hysterically.)
JC: Ha-ha, very good, very good! Well, the audience here
certainly enjoyed that, uh, visual joke. I only hope the
soundtrack does justice to it, because it certainly was, ha, a
most outstanding joke. Well, it's still all pretty visual so
far, ah, now here is some dialogue. This is the first dialogue
scene, a very funny little scene this between Arthur and his
servant Patsy there and two unnamed soldiers, standing on the
battlements of this castle. The castle itself is, uh, I'd say
120 to 130 feet high, simple stone walled keep, uh, 14th
century probably, and Arthur is engaged in asking the soldier
standing right up there on the top of the walls, if he knows of
any knights who might be prepared to join King Arthur at the
Round Table and the knight amusingly replies in a cheerful and
quite unexpected ma-
MP: Oh, shut up!
JC: Sorry.
(Stavro Arrgolus) |
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