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Duration: 2:38 
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Rick: "Hey kids, stop snogging and pay attention to me. 'Cos if you're a wild-eyed loner standing at the gates of Oblivion,
hitch a ride with us. 'Cos we're on the last freedom moped out
of Nowhere City, and we haven't even told our parents what
time we'll be back ! So put on your dancing trousers, and get
down to the utter King of Rock and Roll, CLIFF RICHARD !!!"
(jumps in the air)
Cliff: Got myself a crying, talking, sleeping, walking, living doll.
(singing) Got to do my best to please her just 'cos she's a livin' doll.
Got a roving eye and that is why she satisfies my soul,
I've got the one and only walking talking livin' doll.

OK guys, ready Vyv?
Vyv: Completely ready when you are, Shaky!
Cliff: Neil?
Neil: Does anybody know where the toilets are?
Cliff: Mike?
Mike: Hey, does all this money really have to go to charity?
Mike: Yes it does, Michael! Hi Cliff, it's me !
Cliff: Who are you?
Rik: Huh he, great joke, Your Majesty!

Cliff: (singing) "Got myself a crying, talking, sleeping, walking
living doll"
Young
Ones: (singing rather badly) "Living doll"

Cliff: "Got to do my best to please her, just 'cos she's a living
doll"
Young
Ones: "Living doll"
Cliff: Got a roving eye and that is why she satisfies my soul
Young
Ones: "'Fies my soul!
Vyv: Fies my soul ?!
Rik: Yes Vyvyan, it's raunchy!
Mike: Shut up guys!

All: (singing) I've got the one and only walking talking living
doll!
Rick: OK daddy-io! Lay the next funky riff on me!
Mike: He means, "What happens now?" Cliff.
Cliff: The instrumental break.
(twangy guitars)
"Great, which instruments do you want us to break?"
"Guitar" (sound of guitar played very badly, followed by
Vyv: smashing noises)
"Piano" (same again)
"Violin" (blah blah)
"Didgeridoo"
Rick: "Vyvian's trousers" (ripping noises)
Vyv: "Rick's head" *thud*
Neil: "Yeah! Ah, ah, Neil's head!" *thud*
Vyv: Hey! Cliff's head!
All: "No! No! NO!"
Rick: (singing)Oh take a look at her hair, it's real.
Neil: If you don't believe what I say ...
Mike: ... just feel!
Rick: Fwooaaarggh!
Vyv: (loudly) GONNA LOCK HER UP IN A TRUNK!
Mike: So no big hunk ...
Cliff: ... can steal her away from me.
(more twangy guitars)

Rick: "I still think locking girls up in a trunk is politically
unsound."
Mike: "It's only a song, Rick."
Neil: "Well, I feel sorry for the elephants."
Cliff: Got myself a ...
Neil: ... crying ...
Vyv: ... talking ...
Mike: ... sleeping ...
Rick: ... walking ...
Young
Ones: ... livin' doll!

Cliff: Livin' doll. Got to do my best to please her just cause she's
a livin' doll.
Young
Ones: Livin' doll!
Cliff: OK guys, harmony now.
Young (very unharmonious) Got a rovin' eye and that is why she
Ones: satisfies my soul
Cliff: 'Fies my soul.
All: I've got the one and only walking talking livin' doll!
Rick: Oo-oo-oo-oo-ooooooh!
Cliff: I've got the one and only walking talking livin' doll!
(flourish, end of guitar riff)
Cliff: Erm... can I go now?
Rick: Er, yeah, thanks, Cliff, bye!
(Vyv hits Cliff with a club, Cliff falls to floor)

Rick: "Right kids, if you don't buy this record, you're an utter
utter utter utter utter ..."

(Meanwhile Vyv knocks out Mike and Neil, then Rick ('utter
ut-*thwack*-ter...'). He then looks around the room, looks at the camera,
smiles, shrugs, and then knocks himself out. The picture reverts to snow,
and on the record there seems to be a scratch.)
(A-Log)
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Current Rating 0.0 (0 votes)
Played on 3 shows:
11-12-11, #AOTA-11111205-04-86, #KMET-86-18
05-25-86, #86-21
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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