Hedge Trimmer by Nat Budin

Song Details

Hedge Trimmer
By: Nat Budin

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Duration:	4:00
Release Date:	2020 (Halfshell)
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Dementia is in the lyrics (Halfshell)

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Song Lyrics:

I just got a spouse; we bought a f***ing house
In unincorporated Snohomish county
Guess I’ll settle down, suburbanize, sell out
Slip off my college gown and be a townie
This land is f***ing gorgeous, I love this f***ing lawn
Surrounded on all sides by thirty feet of hedge
Which I’ve gotta trim

Where did my weekend go? I just don’t f***ing know
I just went out my door to do some yard work
The next thing that I see, the sky turned black on me
All these gorgeous plants are f***ing hard work
How do these f***ing yuppies own these f***ing lawns
There’s just got to be a better way

When you’re feeling shitty cause your hedge is all fucked up
There’s just one thing that you can do
Go buy yourself a Black and Decker PowerCut
Show those plants the one in charge is you
With a hedge trimmer

Can you believe my hedge? It’s got a perfect edge
I’m outside with my trimmer every morning
The neighbors look my way, and glower as they say
“You really could have given me some warning”
In yard work I am baptized, my soul is cleansed anew
Mazel tov, today I am a man

When you’re feeling shitty cause your hedge is all fucked up
There’s just one thing that you can do
Go buy yourself a Black and Decker PowerCut
Return your masculinity to you
With a hedge trimmer

I ain’t got no HOA (so I gotta trim my f***ing hedge)
Got a 20-foot driveway (so I gotta trim my f***ing hedge)
Neighbors come by every day and then critique my hedge on Facebook

I just looked out my door - no neighbors anymore
And winding down the street, a trail of bodies
I heard a piercing yell, just like a hound from hell
My yard was overrun by f***ing zombies
And in that very moment, I knew what I must do
I went to the garage and found my friend

When you’re seeing zombies creeping through your neighborhood
There’s just one thing that you can do
Go buy yourself a Black and Decker PowerCut
And keep your brains inside of you
With a hedge trimmer (Halfshell)

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*Available on the following album:*
Blue Sky
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