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Song Details
Duration: 3:21 
Release Date: 1996  (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Lyrics By: Artis Leon Ivey Jr. (Coolio)/A. Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Music By: Artis Leon Ivey Jr. (Coolio)/A. Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Produced By: Al Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Released By: Scotti Bros. (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Published By:
Licensing: ASCAP  #370268765 
Keywords: PARODY 
  • The song also includes a part of the theme from "Gilligan's Island." (peterpuck9)
  • Parody of "Gangsta's Paradise" by Coolio (czwrefsteven)
  • Song Lyrics:
    As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
    I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
    But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
    You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
    At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
    Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
    And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
    Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
    I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
    Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
    But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
    Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    I've churned butter once or twice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    It's hard work and sacrifice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We sell quilts at discount price
    Living in an Amish paradise

    A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
    I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
    I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
    'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
    But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
    An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
    I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
    And my homies all I agree I look good in black... fool
    If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
    We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
    But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
    We're just technologically impaired

    There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
    Not a single luxury
    Like Robinson Crusoe
    It's as primitive as can be

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We're just plain and simple guys
    Living in an Amish paradise
    There's no time for sin and vice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We don't fight, we all play nice
    Living in an Amish paradise

    Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
    Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
    Think you're really righteous? Think you're pure in heart?
    Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
    I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
    On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
    So don't be vain and don't be whiny
    Or else, my brother, I might just have to get medieval on your heinie

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We're all crazy Mennonites
    Living in an Amish paradise
    There's no cops or traffic lights
    Living in an Amish paradise
    But you'd probably think it bites
    Living in an Amish paradise

    Ooh...... Yecch!
    (Sonic SBL)
    Current Rating 10.0 (4 votes)
    Played on 82 shows:
    01-21-24, #SF_2311-14-04, #XM-77
    12-31-22, #AOTA-22123109-19-04, #04-38
    11-11-22, #WOTR-30106-27-04, #XM-57
    10-08-22, #AOTA-22100806-06-04, #04-23
    10-01-22, #AOTA-22100106-29-03, #03-26
    05-08-21, #AOTA-21050805-05-02, #02-18
    11-02-19, #KMCC-14-0501-13-02, #02-02
    10-05-19, #AOTA-19100507-15-01, #01-28
    08-03-19, #AOTA-19080304-01-01, #01-13
    05-18-19, #AOTA-19051812-31-00, #00-53
    04-14-19, #OTR-5-1508-20-00, #00-34
    10-06-18, #AOTA-18100604-09-00, #00-15
    09-01-18, #AOTA-18090101-16-00, #00-03
    09-29-17, #WOTR_5201-02-00, #00-01
    05-15-17, #OTR-3-2008-22-99, #99-34
    02-25-17, #AOTA-17022505-23-99, #99-21
    03-22-15, #BWR-15-03-2202-21-99, #99-08
    07-12-14, #AOTA-14071209-13-98, #98-37
    01-21-14, #BWR-14-01-2104-19-98, #98-16
    10-06-12, #AOTA-12100612-28-97, #97-52
    09-29-12, #12-3911-16-97, #97-46
    09-29-12, #AOTA-12092909-07-97, #97-36
    12-31-11, #11-5308-24-97, #97-34
    11-26-11, #11-4805-04-97, #97-18
    09-17-11, #AOTA-11091702-02-97, #97-05
    07-02-11, #11-2712-29-96, #96-52
    06-07-11, #BWR-11-06-0712-29-96, #KSCA-96-52
    03-26-11, #11-1310-20-96, #96-42
    01-07-11, #ROTP_33309-08-96, #96-36
    09-25-10, #10-3907-21-96, #96-29
    08-13-10, #ROTP_31206-30-96, #96-26
    10-04-09, #09-4006-09-96, #96-23
    08-31-07, #MMDT20_07-3406-02-96, #96-22
    02-11-07, #MMS-6505-19-96, #96-20
    01-07-07, #07-0104-28-96, #96-17
    09-03-06, #MMS-4304-21-96, #96-16
    08-20-06, #06-3404-14-96, #96-15
    03-05-06, #MMS-2004-07-96, #96-14
    01-27-06, #06-0503-31-96, #96-13
    05-22-05, #XM-10403-17-96, #96-11
    05-01-05, #05-1803-10-96, #96-10
    = Show you can listen to online
    Messages about the song: "Amish Paradise"
      Online  -   -  04-02-07 08:43 PM  -  17 years ago
    This song is funny specialy the burnin in Hell part if u think the lyrics are dumb WATCH THE VIDEO!!! Posted by ILL BICTH SLAP U SO HARD U THINK UR MICHEAL JAKSON FUCKIN A MAN
    Enter a New Message
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    Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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