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Song Details
Duration: 3:04 
Release Date: 1985  () 
Lyrics By: A. Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Music By: H. Lewis/C. Hayes (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Produced By: Rick Derringer () 
Released By: Scotti Bros. () 
Published By: Lew Bob Songs (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Licensing: BMI  #689243 
  • Parody of "I Want A New Drug" by Huey Lewis and the News. (peterpuck9)
  • From the 1985 album DARE TO BE STUPID. (sav-man)
  • Song Lyrics:
    Woh oh

    I want a new duck
    One that won't try to bite
    One that won't chew a hole in my socks
    One that won't quack all night

    I want a new duck
    One with big webbed feet
    One that knows how to wash my car
    And keep his room real neat

    One that won't raid the ice box
    One that'll stay in shape
    One that's never gonna try to migrate or escape
    Or I'll tie him up with duck tape

    I want a new duck
    A mallard, I think
    One that won't make a mess of my house
    Or build a nest in the bathroom sink

    I want a new duck
    One that won't steal my beer
    One that won't stick his bill in my mail
    One that knows the duck stops here

    One that won't drive me crazy waddling all around
    One who'll teach me how to swim and help me not to drown
    And show me how to get down
    How to get down baby

    Get it?

    I want a new duck
    Not a swan or a goose
    Just a drake I can dress real cute
    Think I'm gonna name him Bruce

    I want a new duck
    Not a quail or an owl
    One that won't molt too much
    One that won't smell too fowl

    One that won't beg for breadcrumbs
    Hangin' around all day
    He'd better mind his manners
    Better do just what I say
    Or he's gonna be duck pate, duck pate, yah, yah

    [lots of quacking sounds]
    Current Rating 9.5 (4 votes)
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    Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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