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Song Lyrics: |
Funeral Directors of America, I am very deeply honored standing here; Receiving this token of your esteem, "The Funeral Director of the Year." Now I've been asked by all the delegates--and members of the board, To tell you of the funeral that won me this award. It was handled with taste and dignity, that much I can say for it; And I'm sure it will take the family twenty years to pay for it!
It was a helluva fun'ral, It was a helluva fun'ral The finest fun'ral ever booked: I had some high school juniors who passed around petunial And lilies everywhere you looked. It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral Oh, how I wish that you were there; I had ten drum majorettes doubling on the castanets It really was a lively affair It really was a lively affair. It was a helluva fun'ral, It was a helluva fun'ral The national guard showed up for me; And during the oration, they went into formation And formed the letters R. I. P. It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral I gave it all my loving care; The band was on its toes playing "Mexicali Rose", It really was a lively affair. It really was a lively affair. A tisket a tasket, Tell us about the casket
Well, I'll tell you 'bout the casket, my good friends It would-a made your poor eyes pop It was sterling silver all around and a real formica top. (Formica top, it had a formica top). Well, I'll tell you 'bout the widow, my good friends, The widow was in navy blue With a gown designed by Balenciaga, I supplied that too. (He sold the widow widow's weeds too). I held the first funereal raffle, though I don't much like to boast And I gave away a Chevrolet to the person who cried the most. (He gave away a brand new Chevrolet). I won it myself! There were eighteen jugglers by the grave to demonstrate their art And when they were done, I fired a gun to let the hoot-e-nanny start. (He fired a gun and the hoot-e-nanny begun). I was serving beer and prtzels, 'til the hot pastrami came; And I sold some souvenir hankies with the dear departed's name. (He was sellin' hankies with the dear departed's name). As a fitting finale we had the Rockettes from New Your's Music Hall; As you can see, my very good friends All in all, all in all: [Sung:] It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral No other burial could compare; It was all done up deluxe 'n' I made forty thousand bucks, It really was a lively affair. It really was a swingin' affair! (Captain Wayne) |
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Current Rating
10.0
(2 votes)
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Played on 16 shows: |
| 10-31-15, #15-44 | | 05-20-84, #84-21 |
| 07-30-11, #11-31 | | 01-29-84, #84-05 |
| 04-18-10, #10-16 | | 10-23-83, #83-43 |
| 03-26-06, #06-13 | | 12-26-82, #82-52 |
| 05-10-92, #92-19 | | 07-25-82, #82-30 |
| 06-04-89, #89-23 | | 11-29-81, #81-48 |
| 03-20-88, #88-12 | | 10-22-78, #78-36 |
| 08-10-86, #86-32 | | 05-11-75, #45 |
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended
to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before
they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted
under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The
ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.
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