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| Song Lyrics: |
Funeral Directors of America, I am very deeply honored standing here;
Receiving this token of your esteem, "The Funeral Director of the
Year."
Now I've been asked by all the delegates--and members of the board,
To tell you of the funeral that won me this award.
It was handled with taste and dignity, that much I can say for it;
And I'm sure it will take the family twenty years to pay for it!
It was a helluva fun'ral, It was a helluva fun'ral
The finest fun'ral ever booked:
I had some high school juniors who passed around petunial
And lilies everywhere you looked.
It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral
Oh, how I wish that you were there;
I had ten drum majorettes doubling on the castanets
It really was a lively affair
It really was a lively affair.
It was a helluva fun'ral, It was a helluva fun'ral
The national guard showed up for me;
And during the oration, they went into formation
And formed the letters R. I. P.
It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral
I gave it all my loving care;
The band was on its toes playing "Mexicali Rose",
It really was a lively affair.
It really was a lively affair.
A tisket a tasket, Tell us about the casket
Well, I'll tell you 'bout the casket, my good friends
It would-a made your poor eyes pop
It was sterling silver all around and a real formica top.
(Formica top, it had a formica top).
Well, I'll tell you 'bout the widow, my good friends,
The widow was in navy blue
With a gown designed by Balenciaga, I supplied that too.
(He sold the widow widow's weeds too).
I held the first funereal raffle, though I don't much like to boast
And I gave away a Chevrolet to the person who cried the most.
(He gave away a brand new Chevrolet). I won it myself!
There were eighteen jugglers by the grave to demonstrate their art
And when they were done, I fired a gun to let the hoot-e-nanny start.
(He fired a gun and the hoot-e-nanny begun).
I was serving beer and prtzels, 'til the hot pastrami came;
And I sold some souvenir hankies with the dear departed's name.
(He was sellin' hankies with the dear departed's name).
As a fitting finale we had the Rockettes from New Your's Music Hall;
As you can see, my very good friends
All in all, all in all:
[Sung:]
It was a helluva fun'ral, I say one helluva fun'ral
No other burial could compare;
It was all done up deluxe 'n' I made forty thousand bucks,
It really was a lively affair. It really was a swingin' affair! (Captain Wayne) |
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Current Rating
10.0
(2 votes)
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| Played on 16 shows: |
 | 10-31-15, #15-44 | | 05-20-84, #84-21 |
| 07-30-11, #11-31 | | 01-29-84, #84-05 |
| 04-18-10, #10-16 | | 10-23-83, #83-43 |
| 03-26-06, #06-13 | | 12-26-82, #82-52 |
| 05-10-92, #92-19 | | 07-25-82, #82-30 |
| 06-04-89, #89-23 | | 11-29-81, #81-48 |
| 03-20-88, #88-12 | | 10-22-78, #78-36 |
| 08-10-86, #86-32 | | 05-11-75, #45 |
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Enter a New Message
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Message:
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended
to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before
they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted
under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The
ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.
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