Army Careers by The Frantics

Song Details

Army Careers
By: The Frantics

		Play Sample:

This song is not available for free download
due to copyright or license restrictions.

Duration:	3:12
Release Date:	2004 (DJ Particle)
Lyrics By:
Music By:
Produced By:
Released By:
Published By:
Licensing:
Keywords:

Reviews:

Facts:

Web pages about this song:

Where to Buy:

Song Lyrics:

1: Hey, you! Is this where you join the Canadian armed forces?
2: This is the recruitment center. Would you like to enlist?
1: Do you have guns?
2: Yes, we do.
1: I'm in!
2: Well done, welcome aboard. First the paperwork. Name?
1: Ed. Ed Gruberman. I can't wait to boot some head!
2: All right. Well, would you like Army, Navy, or Air Force?
1: Who has the most guns?
2: Uh, Army.
1: I want Army.
2: Okay! Now which course would you like?
1: Courses?
2: Yes, to learn a career.
1: I don't want a career, I want a gun. I want a biiiig gun!
2: Everyone wants a free education. It's our incentive to enlist. Now, pick three from this pamphlet.
1: "Introduction to International Politics"? "Computers 101"? "Antique Restoration"?
2: Yes, that qualifies you to work on our helicopters.
1: Look! Don't you have any courses with guns?
2: Well, yes. Last page.
1: "Intro to Ammo"? "Advanced Wounding"? "Creative Bazookas"?! Ooh, ooh! I'll take all these!
2: Fine. Uh, any mental diseases or physical deformities?
1: Okay, I'll take paranoia, three nipples, and uh--
2: No no no no. I mean--
1: What? Oh.
2: Nev-never mind. Would you like in on the pension plan?
1: No.
2: Christmas club?
1: No!
2: Twin or queen size?
1: Look, I want a gun! I want to kill people!
2: What, who?
1: Uh, Afghanis.
2: We're not at war with them.
1: We will be after I start killin' em!
2: No, we don't kill people.
1: Not even Al Qaeda?
2: Oh, no no no. They're dangerous. We don't want to get them angry.
1: What a wimp!
2: I'm not a wimp! I'm EXTREMELY tough. I do advanced pilates.
1: You're a wimp! Have you shot anyone lately?
2: Well, the Canadian Army isn't about shooting people. It's about career training and being all you can be on a limited budget.
1: I want to bathe in a geyser of enemy blood!
2: That hardly sounds sanitary.
1: SCREW sanitary! I want to blow things up like in Shaving Ryan's Privates!
2: No no, no. The-the movie was Saving Private Ryan.
1: What movie?
2: Look-- I--
1: What?
2: What? I--
1: Look, let me explode a few buildings!
2: No!
1: One stab wound!
2: No, our insurance rate will go up.
1: What are you, a bunch of girls?!
2: NO! Well, ek-except for the girls.
1: There's girls in the army?!
2: And they're just as tough as the men.
1: So they don't shoot anyone either, huh?
2: Well, that's not what we do!
1: Wimp! What DO you do?
2: Peacekeeping.
1: Wimp.
2: Border patrol.
1: Wimp.
2: Parades.
1: Wimp!
2: Typing.
1: Wimp!
2: Filing.
1: WIMP!
2: That does it! Get out of here before I do something!
1: Oh, I'm real scared! What are you gonna do, file me out?
2: Uh, wait-wait a minute. Just what are you doing here anyway?
1: I told you! I want a gun, I want a lot of guns, I want to start killing anyone I disagree with!
2: Oh-ho. Oh, you want the AMERICAN army.
1: Oh, okay, thank you. Bye-bye! (Sonic SBL)

Rate This Song:

(Login to cast your vote)

Current Rating 10.0 (3 votes)

Available on the following albums:
Dr. Demento's Basement Tapes #13	Official Bootleg CD
Contact us if you know of another album that contains this song

Played on 50 shows:
	10-14-23, #KMCC-18-04	11-13-05, #05-46
	05-26-18, #AOTA-180526	10-05-05, #KMCC_2-11
	06-10-17, #AOTA-170610	07-24-05, #05-30
	05-06-17, #AOTA-170506	06-26-05, #05-26
	05-21-16, #AOTA-160521	05-15-05, #XM-103
	03-05-16, #ISGD-16-11	05-04-05, #KMCC_2-7.5
	05-30-15, #15-22	04-24-05, #05-17
	11-11-14, #BWR-14-11-11	04-17-05, #XM-99
	05-24-14, #AOTA-140524	03-20-05, #05-12
	08-08-13, #ISGD-13-32	03-20-05, #XM-95
	06-04-13, #BWR-13-06-04	02-27-05, #05-09
	05-25-13, #AOTA-130525	02-20-05, #05-08
	05-14-11, #11-20	01-30-05, #XM-88
	02-12-11, #MMCZ-11-07	01-30-05, #05-05
	02-28-10, #MMCZ-10-09	01-23-05, #XM-87
	01-15-10, #MMDT20_10-03	01-09-05, #05-02
	01-08-10, #MMDT20_10-02	01-06-05, #MMDT20_05-01
	11-20-09, #MMDT20_09-47	01-02-05, #05-01
	06-14-08, #MMCZ_0049	12-27-04, #ISGD-04-61
	05-27-07, #MMS-79	12-26-04, #04-52
	04-15-07, #07-15	11-28-04, #04-48
	11-15-06, #KMCC_3-02	11-24-04, #KMCC_2-06
	01-01-06, #06-01	11-21-04, #04-47
	12-31-05, #ISGD-05-93	11-07-04, #04-45
	12-31-05, #MMS-11	01-01-00, #DT20-05-01
	= Show you can listen to online

Song Images:

Messages about the song: "Army Careers"

	MarlinsGirl Offline - Participant - 05-28-07 07:03 PM - 17 years ago
	fiogf49gjkf0d 2: [unintelligible] science?<-- this one he says " King or Queen Size" Terri M. --- SpongeBobLuvr Okay, I've changed my mind about some of the lyrics: I'm not sure about the ones marked [unintelligible] anymore. Any takers?

	Sonic SBL Offline - Participant - 03-14-06 03:49 PM - 18 years ago
	fiogf49gjkf0d Okay, I've changed my mind about some of the lyrics: I'm not sure about the ones marked [unintelligible] anymore. Any takers?

Enter a New Message

Message:

Show/Hide Border
Table Properties
Delete Table
Row
- Insert Row Above
- Insert Row Below
- Delete Row
Column
- Insert Column to the Left
- Insert Column to the Right
- Delete Column
Cell
- Merge Cells Horizontally
- Merge Cells Vertically
- Split Cell Horizontally
- Split Cell Vertically
- Delete Cell
Cell Properties
Table Properties
Properties...
Image Map Editor
Properties...
OpenLink
Remove Link
Insert Select
Cut
Copy
Paste
Paste from Word
Paste Plain Text
Paste As Html
Paste Html

Zoom

Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.