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| Facts: |
| This bit is the second part of the performance's lengthy three part opening sequence. As proof of this, the final line of the bit is a callback to the "Hello-Goodbye" bit that began the album. (Stavro Arrgolus) |
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| Song Lyrics: |
Now here's a situation you run into all the time. You notice how when you're leaving someone, they give you a message to give to someone else? Like they say, "Give my love to Klaus. Tell Klaus Rebecca sends her love."
Do you mind that? Do you mind being used that way? Do you mind the awesome responsibility of having to carry Rebecca's love to Klaus? Suppose you don't see Klaus. What're you gonna do with Rebecca's love? Carry it around? Give it to someone else, maybe. "Wilhelm! I can't find Klaus, here's some of Rebecca's love." Suppose Wilhelm doesn't know Rebecca. Can he legally accept her love? Especially when it was originally intended for Klaus. Suppose you give Wilhelm Rebecca's love for Klaus and then you see Klaus, what're you gonna give him? All you had was Rebecca's love and you've already gone and given that to Wilhelm! Can you logically ask Wilhelm to give back Rebecca's love to Klaus? Maybe he's gotten used to it by now. Can Klaus sue Wilhelm? Can Wilhelm be arrested? Can you be arrested for transporting love across a state line?
All right, just for the sake of argument, let's leave Wilhelm out of this altogether. Suppose Rebecca gives you her love to give to Klaus and you do see Klaus, what form should the love take? Can you risk giving Klaus a tongue kiss? Which brings up another problem; maybe Klaus is gay. Klaus doesn't want Rebecca's love; Klaus wants Wilhelm's love! If Klaus tells you to give his love to Wilhelm, say, "bulls**t, Klaus! You give your own love to Wilhelm! I'm going to find Rebecca!"
Now, sometimes people don't quite want you to take their love to someone else; they only want you to take their "regards". That's all they're sending that day. Regards. That's not as important as love, is it? By the way, do you always give the one the person wants you to give? I don't. I wait until the last minute and then decide which one the other person ought to get. For instance, Susan might say to me, "Give my love to Dave." Well, I might not feel Dave is deserving of love. Dave might be one of those people who p**s me off. I'll whip a few regards on Dave. Keep him in his place. I feel it's my decision to make. I'm the one who's doing all the goddamn work.
And if I really don't like the other person, I'll drop the message way down. Susan might say, "Give all my love to Dave and tell him I can't wait to see him again so we can make love all night!" I'll say, "Dave! Susan said hello." Screw Dave; that's what he gets for pissing me off.
And some people anticipate which one they're going to get, don't they?
"Did Susan send her love?"
"No, Dave. She didn't. She only sent her regards."
"That's funny, usually she sends her love."
"Well, not this time. In fact, she specifically said, 'Don't give Dave any love.' She's running short of love and has to be careful who she gives it to. However, she's overstocked with regards and wants you to have a whole bunch of them. So be satisfied, Dave. Take your regards and get the f**k out of my life!"
Well, he should be satisfied with regards; at least it's better than just being sent someone's "best". Y'know, some people just send you their best.
"Give my best to Dave."
"Your best what? Frankly Susan, if this is your best, maybe you ought to keep it to yourself."
But even that, even that is better than just being "remembered" to somebody. God, that's the lowest one of all, isn't it. That's hardly worth even telling the poor person.
"Remember me to Dave."
"Okay."
"Dave? You remember Susan?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's it."
My job is done here. I must move along now. I've gotta go see Tex and tell him Billy Bob said "Howdy".
One final little portion of this. Sometimes people want you to take "a hug and a kiss" to someone for them. Now they've got you carrying cargo. "Give him a hug and a kiss for me." Usually it's women; I find that women are a little more expressive at times like these. And sometimes they're really explicit. "Bye-bye Elena. Drive carefully and give Jake a big b*****b for me." Well, why don't you get Klaus to take care of that for ya?
Well, anyway, hello. No matter how we say hello, it's nice to say hello to ya. (Stavro Arrgolus) |
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Message:
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended
to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before
they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted
under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The
ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.
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