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Song Details
Birds And Bees 
By: Nuclear Bubble Wrap
Play Song (Creative Commons License):
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Rank this week: 16 (↑30)
Duration: 3:06 
Release Date: 3/4/2009  (DJ Particle) 
Lyrics By: Nuclear Bubble Wrap (belowaveragedave) 
Music By:
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Licensing: CC 
  • Parody of Pork and Beans by Weezer (MarlinsGirl)
  • Song Lyrics:
    I’m at a middle school each day from 7 till 2
    Teaching kids math and science that they’ll never use
    But each year there’s one thing that I always dread
    The school picked me to teach this subject called sex ed

    This is not the thing that I signed up to do
    It’s not like the kids don’t have a clue
    I tell them all about the birds and bees
    And details all about each STD
    I scare them, saying they all are gonna die
    If they even think ‘bout getting cozy at night
    I try to be cool but my face turns bright red
    Why can’t their parents teach ‘em this instead?

    Everyone starts to laugh cause they’re little tards
    Why must a class like this be so long and hard?
    But since it comes so quickly I think that is great
    I’d hate for the class to turn into a mass debate

    These are not the classes that I wanna do
    I can’t wait until the day is through
    I tell them all about the birds and bees
    And scare them with a rant on pregnancy
    They all treat the class as if it’s all a joke
    Wrapping their hands around innuendos
    And I swear to god, I’m gonna lose my head
    If I hear another “That’s What She Said”

    Out of here… Out of here…
    I want out of here, out of here, out of here
    Out of here…

    This is not the thing that I signed up to do
    It’s not like they don’t know how to screw
    I tell them all about the birds and bees
    It’s not like they haven’t seen it on TV
    They all know this stuff, they’ve got the internet
    This isn’t a subject that they could forget
    Kids will do anything to get ahead
    Why can’t their parents teach ‘em this instead?

    Lyrics courtesy of
    Current Rating 9.6 (2 votes)
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