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Song Details
Duration: 3:26 
Release Date: 11/25/2016 
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Song Lyrics:
lyrics & vocals: Carla Ulbrich
piano & "strings": Bob Malone
Instrumental track recorded in Bob Demarco's amazing studio in Camarillo, CA in 2015 as part of the "Totally Average Woman" project, but the lyrics weren't quite the way I wanted them until a couple months later.

She can gross out your friends
Even all of the guys
And a language so filthy you’ll need a vaccine
Chronologically grown but she’ll always be stuck at 13

She’ll moon all your neighbors then make sure they see you
You can say you hate poop jokes she’ll never believe you
Got the feel for the wheel keep the movin’ parts clean
Quoting David Lee Roth she will always be stuck at 13

Oh she amuses herself
and a few other folks
at least some of the time
Oh will she ever grow up?
Oh what grade are we in?
Her head’s up her behind

And she’ll bring whoopee cushions to corporate meetings
And she’ll give you a noogie and laugh while you’re screaming
But she’s good for a laugh and a silly routine
Blaming farts on the dog she will always be stuck at 13

Doo doo…

Oh and she’s telling herself
That she’s misunderstood
She’s ahead of her time
Oh and she never shuts up
If you taped up her mouth
She would just pantomime

She is frequently smart then she’s suddenly crude
And she’ll play any gig even if they are nude
This is not what you do with a college degree
You’d expect something new when she turned 32
But she’ll always be stuck at 13

Mi mi mi..
This song is all about me
(Captain Wayne)
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.

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