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Song Details
Duration: 2:47 
Release Date: 1999  (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Lyrics By: E.Robertson/A.Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Music By: E.Robertson/A.Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Produced By: Al Yankovic (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Released By: Volcano (Stavro Arrgolus) 
Published By:
  • Parody of "One Week" by Bare Naked Ladies. (czwrefsteven)
  • Song Lyrics:
    It's been one week since we got to see
    Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry
    Five days since they had the show
    With the hermaphrodite, the slut, and the crack ho
    Three days since we heard the tale
    About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male
    Yesterday it occurred to me
    That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer

    Holy cow, d'you see it last week?
    Well, they had this one freak
    Who sucker-punched his whole family
    Do you recall when the brawl
    Became a total free-for-all
    And Jerry's in the middle tryin' to be the referee
    Hey, see the stripper with the implants
    She likes to lap dance
    And date the boyfriend of her mother
    Now, here comes Jerry's next guest
    And it's a slugfest
    'Cause it's her trailer trash brother
    Nymphomaniac is back on crack
    It's like "When Animals Attack"
    They all exhibit reprehensible behavior
    Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their clothes
    Step on their toes, that's how it goes
    They get so violent they have to sign a waiver

    They're always swearin', cursin', kickin' butt, and pointin' blame
    On the air? They don't care, they've got no shame
    There was one guy who I'm sure felt a little strange
    When he found out that his wife had a sex change
    They have a tendency to scream and yell constantly
    They have a history of ripping off their shirts

    It's been one week since they had the fight
    With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
    Five days since that awful brawl
    They still haven't got the blood off the wall
    It's been three days since the bitter feud
    Between the KKK and that gay Jewish black dude
    Yesterday, finally dawned on me
    I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry Springer

    Guy Guest : Baby, I've been sleepin' with your sister
    Gal Guest : Oh? Well, which one?
    Guy Guest : All of them
    Gal Guest : Oh! Well, I've been sleepin' with your best friend Jake!
    Guy Guest : Yeah? Well, well me too!
    Gal Guest : Oh!
    Guy Guest : And I've sleepin' with your dog Woofie!
    Gal Guest : Woofie, you b-tch!
    Gal Guest : Well, I'm also sleepin' with your pet goat!
    Guy Guest : That goat doesn't love you!

    Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin'
    Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin'
    Jerry's the king of confrontation
    He's a sensation
    He puts the 'sin' in syndication
    It's totally worthless, like a bad check
    It's like a train wreck
    Don't wanna stare but you can't look away
    Like Sally Jessy he does talk shows
    But with more weirdos
    The ratings jumpin' higher everyday
    If you've seen the show, well then you know
    It's just as low as you can go
    The guests are tacky and they're lacking in their hygiene
    And pretty soon some ugly goon
    Comes in the room and then it's BOOM
    In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen

    Well it's the kind of show where people scream obscenities
    Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies
    "Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their favorite chant
    Should I turn off my TV? I just can't
    I have a tendency to watch it religiously
    I have a history of taping each one

    It's been one week since the show about
    Psycho killers with problems they should work out
    Five days since the big surprise
    When some loser's wife said she's still dating twenty guys
    Three days since he interviewed
    A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were all nude
    Yesterday, it occurred to me
    That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
    Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer
    I've got way too much class to watch Jerry Springer
    Come over here and pull on my finger
    (Sonic SBL)
    Jerry Springer--"Weird Al" Yankovic(View Larger)