Supermarket / His Majesty the Policeman  By: Lord Buckley

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Supermarket [musical introduction] Whoa! Wasn't that like a beautiful circus? Wasn't it really? Seemed to me like it was a beautiful circus. Didn't it to you? All kinds of flags wavin' and a hummin' and a jumpin' and a runnin' and a flippin'... You're very beautiful. The lead drummer there owns one of the largest health farms in the valley. He gets a little too healthy once in a while, you see. Milords, Miladies. This is Lincoln's Day. I'm waiting for someone to tell me it isn't. It's Lincoln's Day. Tomorrow should be Lincoln's Day and the next day should be Lincoln's Day and we should have Lincolnville and Lincoln Park and Lincoln Lincoln and it should be Lincoln Head City because he laid it down tight and right and cool and crazy. If they could have stayed with it, it would have been a gasser. We're pretty tight on it. We're pretty tight on it, but we could tighten up a little bit. We gotta knock out the greed heads. Lincoln didn't dig the greed heads. You understand what I mean? Like the supermarkets for one kick. Remember the first supermarkets? They said, "Ho, the supermarket! Got oranges, bananas, an' mannas an' sannas an' coos... You go in." Say, "Oh, yes!" "Whatta ya' do?" "You get a cart." "You do?" "Well, where's the fruit?" "It's over there." "It is?" "Have you seen the ravi... " "No, I don't know anything about that." And there you are pushin' in the supermarket with the cart. You grab the cart and you go strolling up and down the aisles and you load up all your jazz and you're working for them, see? But it's alright. It's alright, because you're getting - this is the beginning - very, very, low, low, low, low prices. Saving, you see. So you don't mind, you know, pushing a little bit. And then, a few swings of the ( ? ). Same supermarket, same cart. Prices - whhhhooooo! And you're still pushin' the mother cart. Still workin' for 'em. And you'll even take carts and push them into other carts, to show that you're... Right? It's amazing. But it's a charge, isn't it? I love to go... I wish I had the nerve to be a great thief. I know a fellow that can put seventeen sirloin steaks in his britches and you can't see 'em. Gets a little chill before he gets out of there. Just loves to steal. I can understand that. Can't you? Course. Oh, it's a hangup! Abe wouldn't dig that jazz. Well, it's a kick anyway, isn't it? What a great thing it is to be alive. My Lords. My Ladies. Would it embarrass you very much if I were to tell you that I love ya? It embarrasses ya, doesn't it? __________________________________________________________________ His Majesty The Policeman I got to thinking about His Majesty, The Policeman, see. I figured that must be the draggiest job in the world. And what a drag it is going out on a good day. You're feeling really good. You're riding along and your squad car is all polished up, you know what I mean. And you're feeling real mellow. Along comes some poor stud with a - loaded with kids, like flower pots all over the place. Going a little too fast, you know what I mean. You've got to stop the cat. You've got to bring him down and lay one on him. It's a pretty tough job and when you walk up to him you don't know whether they're going to pull out a French seventy-five or what-the. It's a drag. So, I wrote a little thing called: [sings] His Majesty, The Policeman, He's the children's friend at every bend, The Policeman And you can bet your life, He's hip to Mack the Knife That's His Majesty, The Policeman You should never trip a policeman Or try to hip or even tip a policeman Get a ticket to the ball And you can't fight city hall That's His Majesty, The Policeman So remember their nobility They're here, they're there, they're everywhere it's mobility You can look near and far but they'll pin you by radar That's Their Majesty, The Policeman Here they come - hewbetty boop The Man In Blue - hoobbit bop The Sargent's there - ribbetty bip The Patrolman too - hahbetta bop The Chief looks great - hahbetta bop The Captain's straight - ribbetty bip Hip Hip Hurray - da da da dah The Royal Crew - Habetta bahbetta bah You always try to swing with a policeman And never ring-a-ding a policeman And if you're really hip You'll never make a slip Against Their Majesties, The Policemen (Adam)

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	08-07-88, #88-32

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