Either the Night Before Christmas or the Day After I Got Paid Still Getting Drunk at the Bar  By: Art Paul Schlosser

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Duration:	3:57
Release Date:	2003  (artpaul)
Lyrics By:	Art Paul Schlosser & Clement Clarke Moore (artpaul)
Music By:	Art Paul Schlosser & Clement Clarke Moore (artpaul)
Produced By:	Art Paul Schlosser & Randy Green (artpaul)
Released By:	Art Paul Schlosser Inc (artpaul)
Published By:	Art Paul Schlosser (artpaul)
Licensing:	CC
Keywords:	ART PAUL SCHLOSSER, CHRISTMAS, COMEDY, DRINKING, PARODY, SPOKEN WORD, THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

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Song Lyrics:

'Twas the night before Christmas And all through the house Not a creature was stirring Well except for Daddy with a computer mouse. All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care (What's a chimney ? What are stockings ? I hope they don't, That one stocking is kind of ugly and dirty I hope they don't expect Santa to put his hand down there) In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there (On his rocket-ship because the reindeer I'm not sure, you know people are shooting a lot of reindeer these days) Then what to my wondering eyes should appear But a martin spaceship with martins that look kind of ***** A little old driver, so lively and quick I knew in a moment it wasn't St. Nick And more rapid than eagles his spaceship it seemed? I thought maybe this is either a nightmare or a very strange dream So up on the house top that spaceship it flew And I was wondering why it was landing it was kind I felt really confused You know because of I didn't see the script for the movie I was in And a I'd been drinking a couple tonics and gin. Well all of sudden the martins came down the chimney And they started to look funny at me And one said lets sing Grand Ma Got Run Over By A Reindeer And the other 2 they sang kind of weird Well the next thing I knew it was morning or noon And I woke up at the bar and it was June (Laughter) I'm sorry I guess this is, so I don't know if this is a good rhyme or not but Hey Merry Christmas to all and to all who are listening to the poem that I am making up at I go May you get a real gift but hey what the heck if you stuck with coal You can always do an art piece on white paper And that'll be kind of nifty and dear Have fun and Keep your day job (artpaul)

Available on the following album:

Words of Cheese & Other Parrot Trees

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