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| Song Lyrics: |
Anything that we all do and never talk about..is funny, man. Have you ever been making out with someone and one of you have a snot that's whistling? (makes 'snot whistling' noises) "Hah, I think we blew a tune on the climax, honey."
Here's something I discovered was really more universal than I'd ever suspected. Well, maybe not. Ahh, a little bit. Anyway, y'know what I mean? And I found out...I found out by asking people. When you take a p**s, do you go like this? (makes 'shiver' noise) I found out even women do that, man. (makes female 'shiver' noise) It's a different position. What is that, man? It has no name. I call it the p**s Shiver. It's nature's way of shaking off. And it goes back to the days when we didn't hold onto it. (makes 'shiver' noise again) Sure.
Isn't that funny how we say 'take a s**t' and 'take a p**s'; you don't take 'em, you leave 'em!
"I left a s**t, Bill!"
"Jeez, where'd you leave it this time? Last year, the kids didn't find it till Easter!"
"I'm gonna take a s**t!"
"Don't take one of mine! Only have three left and the weekend is coming up. Why don't you go home and take one of your own shits? Guy's always taking my shits."
When I have to take a s**t at the airport, I usually go in the handicapped stall. First of all, it's free. Secondly, everything's bigger in there, man. Yeah, your feet don't even touch the ground, man. You feel like Shirley Temple..waiting for Raymond Burr. "Let me in there!"
Belly noise, gut rumblings...when your stomach is talking to you. Your stomach is talking to you! I think that's called borborygmi. Always told it was called borborygmi. Which would be a good name for it- (silly stomach noises:) BORBORYGMI! MUNYA! NEEYA WUNEYA BWOYOYOYOYYOY! That's a familiar one, right? OYOYOYOYOYOY! D'ya ever notice that one bubble sounds a lot like the last one did? Goes the same way- past the corn, around the peas, under the beef, over the gravy. WOOYAYA WUNYA BWOYOYOYOYOY! One of the great times that your stomach does a lot of this orating is when you're sitting in the dentist's waiting room. Everything's quiet, man. You're reading 'Cuspid Annual' and your stomach is showing off or attracting attention- WAAAAAA! OONYEE WAAA! Saying things like WE'RE POOR! WEEREEE POOOOOR! And you try to shuffle the book and go RRRRMRMRM.
Didja ever belch and taste a hot dog you had two days ago? "Hey, that was almost puke! It was a toss up between puke and hot dog there!"
In New York, if you spit in the subway, it's a fifty dollar fine. Vomiting is free, man! Have you ever noticed that your whole sense of values changes when you're throwing up? "I don't care about my shoes!" (vomit noise) (Stavro Arrgolus) |
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended
to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before
they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted
under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The
ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.
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