|
|
|
Rank this week: 10 (↑26)
|
Duration:
|
4:30
|
|
Release Date:
|
3/14/2008 (Captain Wayne)
|
|
Lyrics By:
|
Parody Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion (peterpuck9)
|
|
Music By:
|
Parody Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion (peterpuck9)
|
|
Produced By:
|
|
|
Released By:
|
thefump.com (peterpuck9)
|
|
Published By:
|
|
|
Licensing:
|
CC
|
|
Keywords:
|
|
|
| Facts: |
| Parody of "Can't Fight This Feeling" by REO Speedwagon (czwrefsteven) |
| Web pages about this song: |
|
| Song Lyrics: |
CAN'T FIND MY PENIS
Parody of REO Speedwagon's "Can't Fight This Feeling"
Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion
PERFORMED BY ROBERT LUND
I can't make my penis any longerrr
Despite a zillion email guarantees
There's not a big shortcoming with my dongerrr
The actual problem is my gut's grown past my knees
I tell myself I should cut out carbohydrates
But that would mean less pretzels with my beerrr
And though it sucks to horrify my blind dates
I've got more spots to hide gerbils
Than a guy like Richard Gerrre
My diet should be stricterrr
But that's a useless fight
When the scale I use is Richterrr
And my butt's a launching site
And I'd disappear if they sucked off my cellulite
And I can't find my penis anymorrre
I've forgotten where it used to be beforrre
I'm scared it's been sent off to fight the warrr
Or trashed by Michael Moorrre
Foreverrr
'Cause I can't find my penis anymorrre
I've forgotten what that part was ever forrr
So maybe it was mugged in Baltimorrre
Or snuffed like Dumbledorrre
Baby, I can't find my penis anymorrre
[Guitarrr solo]
I once auditioned to go on The Biggest Loserrr
But I ate the cast with Krispy Kremes for lunch
And my shrink believes I'm a cereal abuserrr
My gateway drug was Froot Loops
Now I mainline Captain Crunch
I've grossed out my reflection
He wishes he was blind
When I gaze at my midsection
Why do sperm whales spring to mind?
And I'm getting larger than Shrek and your mom combined
And I can't find my penis anymorrre
I've forgotten what I started looking forrr
It's time to just give up the Trojan Warrr
I've lost my chance to scorrre
Foreverrr
'Cause I can't find my penis anymorrre
There's no Dick Van Dyke for Mary Tyler Moorrre
I'd like to drag my ass up off the floorrr
But standing up's a chorrre
And I just can't find my penis anymorrre
© Spaff.com 2004, 2008+
Like it? Hate it? Say so.
(peterpuck9) |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Current Rating
9.7
(4 votes)
|
|
|
| Played on 21 shows: |
 | 09-16-17, #KMCC- 12-02 | | 08-30-08, #MMCZ_SP01 |
| 09-16-17, #AOTA-170916 | | 06-14-08, #ROTP_199 |
 | 06-14-14, #14-24 | | 05-02-08, #MMDT20_08-17 |
| 01-18-14, #14-03 | | 04-27-08, #08-17 |
| 06-08-13, #MMS-162 | | 04-18-08, #MMDT20_08-15 |
| 11-23-12, #MMDT20_12-47 | | 04-04-08, #MMDT20_08-13 |
| 02-18-12, #MMP-15 | | 03-30-08, #08-13 |
| 08-13-10, #ROTP_312 | | 03-28-08, #MMDT20_08-12 |
| 06-30-09, #KMCC_5-20 | | 03-21-08, #MMDT20_08-11 |
| 05-19-09, #KMCC_5-17 | | 03-15-08, #MMCZ_08-11 |
| 11-29-08, #ROTP_223 | | |
| = Show you can listen to online |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Enter a New Message
|
Message:
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|