The Twelve Pains Of Christmas by Bob Rivers Comedy Corp

Song Details

The Twelve Pains Of Christmas
By: Bob Rivers Comedy Corp

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Rank this week: 10 (↑27)

Duration:	3:41
Release Date:	1987 (Stavro Arrgolus)
Lyrics By:	Traditional/B.Rivers/D.Amero/B.Silva (Stavro Arrgolus)
Music By:	Traditional/B.Rivers/D.Amero/B.Silva (Stavro Arrgolus)
Produced By:	B. Rivers/D.Amero/B.Silva (Stavro Arrgolus)
Released By:	Critique A2 90671 (Stavro Arrgolus)
Published By:	EMI April Music/Solid Smash Music Publishing/Twisted Tunes (Stavro Arrgolus)
Licensing:	ASCAP #500544754
Keywords:

Reviews:

Facts:

Parody of "The Twelve Days of Christmas" (czwrefsteven)

Web pages about this song:

YouTube - Bob Rivers Comedy Corp - The Twelve Pains Of Christmas (MarlinsGirl)

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Song Lyrics:

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me, is finding a Christmas tree.

The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Rigging up the lights.
And finding a Christmas tree.

The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Hangovers.
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree.

The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Sending Christmas cards.
Hangovers.
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree.

The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Five months of bills.
Sending Christmas cards.
Hangovers.
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree.

The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Facing my in-laws.
Five months of bills.
Oh, I hate those Christmas cards.
Hangovers.
Rigging up the lights.
And finding a Christmas tree.

The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
The Salvation Army.
Facing my in-laws.
Five months of bills.
Sending Christmas cards.
Oh geez!
I'm trying to rig up these lights!
And finding a Christmas tree.

The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
I want a Transformer for Christmas!
Charities! And what do you mean, your in-laws?
Five months of bills.
Ah! Making out these cards.
Edith, get me a beer, huh?
What, we have no extension cords?
And finding a Christmas tree.

The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Finding parking spaces.
Daddy, I want some candy!
Donations.
Facing my in-laws.
Five months of bills.
Writing up those Christmas cards.
Hangovers.
Now why the hell are they blinking?
And finding a Christmas tree.

The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Batteries not included.
No parking spaces.
Buy me something!
Get a job, ya bum!
Facing the in-laws.
Five months of bills.
Yo ho, sending Christmas cards.
Ah geez, look at this.
One light goes out, they all go out!
And finding a Christmas tree.

The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Stale TV specials.
Batteries not included.
No parking spaces.
Mommy, I gotta go to the bathroom!
Charities.
She's a witch, I hate her!
Five months of bills.
Oh! I don't even know half these people.
Who's got the toilet paper, huh?
Get a flashlight, I blew a fuse!
And finding a Christmas tree.

The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me:
Singing Christmas carols.
Stale TV specials.
Batteries not included.
No parking?!?
(sound of an annoying crying child)
Charities!
Gotta make 'em dinner!
Five months of bills.
I'm not sending them this year. That's it!
Shut up, youse!
Fine, you're so smart; you rig up the lights!!!
And finding a Christmas tree.

©Solid Smash Music Pub. Co. Inc. ASCAP (Bill L)

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Current Rating 10.0 (7 votes)

*Available on the following albums:*
Twisted Christmas	Twisted Christmas [Box set]	Holidays in Dementia
Contact us if you know of another album that contains this song

*Played on 83 shows:*
	12-09-23, #AOTA-231209	12-12-09, #BR-09-97
	12-17-22, #AOTA-221217	07-26-09, #MMCZ-09-28
	12-16-22, #ISGD-22-03	07-19-09, #MMCZ-09-27
	12-25-21, #AOTA-211225	12-24-08, #MMS-121
	12-25-20, #WOTR_205	12-14-08, #08-50
	12-05-20, #AOTA-201205	12-13-08, #MMCZ_XMAS08A
	12-21-19, #AOTA-191221	12-12-08, #BR-08-54
	12-22-18, #AOTA-181222	12-05-08, #MMDT20_08-48
	12-21-18, #WOTR_117	12-30-07, #MMS-105
	12-16-17, #AOTA-171216	12-09-07, #07-49
	12-09-17, #AOTA-171209	11-23-07, #MMDT20_07-46
	12-18-16, #OTR-2-49	12-23-06, #ROTP_122
	12-17-16, #16-51	12-17-06, #06-51
	12-12-16, #MMS-207	12-17-05, #MMS-9
	12-23-15, #MMCZ-15-03	12-11-05, #05-50
	12-20-15, #BWR-15-12-20	12-19-04, #XM-82
	12-05-15, #AOTA-151205	12-12-04, #04-50
	12-05-15, #15-49	12-15-03, #XM-30
	12-20-14, #ISGD-14-70	12-14-03, #03-50
	12-16-14, #BWR-14-12-16	12-15-02, #02-50
	12-06-14, #14-49	12-23-01, #01-51
	12-03-14, #MMS-190	12-17-00, #00-51
	12-24-13, #BWR-13-12-24	12-03-00, #00-49
	12-11-13, #ISGD-13-53	12-12-99, #99-50
	12-07-13, #AOTA-131207	12-13-98, #98-50
	12-04-13, #ISGD-13-52	12-07-97, #97-49
	12-25-12, #BWR-12-12-25	12-15-96, #96-50
	12-15-12, #AOTA-121215	12-10-95, #95-50
	12-08-12, #12-49	12-11-94, #94-50
	11-29-12, #ISGD-12-49	12-12-93, #93-50
	12-31-11, #MMCZ-11-53	07-25-93, #93-30
	12-24-11, #MMCZ-11-52	12-20-92, #92-51
	12-23-11, #ROTP_383	12-22-91, #91-51
	12-20-11, #BWR-11-12-20	12-15-91, #91-50
	12-18-11, #MMS-147	12-08-91, #91-49
	12-10-11, #11-50	12-16-90, #90-50
	12-10-11, #AOTA-111210	07-22-90, #90-29
	07-26-11, #BWR-11-07-26	01-07-90, #KLSX-90-01
	01-15-11, #MMCZ 11-03	12-17-89, #89-51
	12-11-10, #10-50	12-03-89, #89-49
	12-20-09, #MMS-134	12-13-87, #87-50
	12-13-09, #09-50
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Song samples are provided for information purposes only and are intended to enable the users to sample the music (as they are in very low quality) before they take the decision of purchasing the music. This right is expressly permitted under "Fair Use" as nonprofit educational purposes only. The ownership of the copyright of the songs rests with the respective owners.